I tried to start another blog – a spin-off of sorts. Didn’t work. I wasn’t feeling it. Kind of like when they gave Joey from Friends his own show.
How yoo dooin?
The reason I started a sister-blog was because I was gone from this one for so long…and I feel like I have been through some life-changin’ stuff since then…that maybe I should start new…and well, that was just silly.
Stephanie’s Addiction has been with me for a long time – and I’m gonna continue with it. I have been through some major events in the past year, but I’m still the same girl. Who loves her Daytimer and wears Chanel eyeshadow* and has a love affair with Starbucks coffee**. And, of course, I am still raising an incredible little girl who says such funny stuff that I must document before I forget.
(*Only because it’s left over from when I had money.)
(**Only because I have gift certificates from Christmas to use.)
I’m still me.
SOOOO, where do I begin?! It’s been a long time, friends!
Regarding where I last left you… I am happy to tell you that Toby and I are together. We have worked hard and will continue to work hard – and we’re in a good place. We have both learned a lot this year and are better people for it – and we are better partners. So thank you for all of the prayers and support.
As for the JOB saga – I’ll address that at another point. I’d rather talk about my SUNSHINE:
Stella is still a hysterical little girl (not a toddler or baby at all anymore. Sigh.) who is getting quite the ‘tude already. Most of it is funny and I have to hide my smiles and laughter at what she comes up with. And some of it shocks me at how such a sweet, innocent, pure little being can say such sassy things to her mother! I am SURE I never did that.
Some things I never want to forget:
She leaves off the “S” at the beginning of words that start with an “S” and a consonant. Example: Stella is Tella. Street is Teet. Spray is Pray. Stickers are Tickers. I have developed the acute ability to know exactly what word she is saying instantly – MOST of the time. Sometimes I have to ask her to repeat herself and she gets that “Gosh MOM!” tone with me. Well, excuuuuuse me!
Over the past 6 months or so, she has really taken to a little stuffed Chihuahua my parents brought her from a trip to The Homestead a year or so ago. When they first brought it, she loved it, but didn’t pay too much attention to it. Then one day, she told me her name was Goldie. HER name. Make sure you do not say HE or you will get a speech about how “she’s a GUURL!” Poor Goldie is looking rough and I am scared! She goes EVERYWHERE with Stella. She sits with her when she eats, she sits on the sink and watches her take a bath, she gardens with her, has her talk on the phone to Neh Neh or Dada when they call, she plays in the sandbox, and even goes potty. She does not, however, go to school with her – because she can’t. BUT Mom tells me that Stella tells Goldie good-bye every morning with a big, dramatic “I love you Goldie! I’ll see you later!” as she gets out of the car.
Speaking of school, Stella started pre-school this past September at the same school where she went to summer camp. She LOVES IT. She goes Monday, Wednesday, Friday from 9-12. She has a boyfriend. He wears TIES to school. TIES! She has a best friend named Zoe – although she tells me that Zoe tries to make her be the baby when they play so she doesn’t like that. Ha! Trouble in paradise. She tells me the funniest stories about school; esp about the playground. It’s so funny to hear her tell stories about her friends Chase, Zoe, Leah, Hannah…and there’s a boy named Fisher who she has a love/hate relationship with… I can just imagine her telling me stories about her friends in elementary school, middle school, and ugh HIGH SCHOOL. It’s going by too fast……
Stella still doesn’t eat much. WHERE did this child come from? When she’s hungry, she will eat – BUT her list of “acceptable” food is very short. And also depends on her moods – she could love something one day and turn her nose up at it the next… drives me insane. I also think she’s going to be a vegetarian…she might eat a chicken nugget every month or so…and a hotdog every now and again…and that’s pretty much it. She always likes pancakes, peanut butter and honey sandwiches, grilled cheese, lots of fruit, yogurt drinks, fruit snacks, macaroni and cheese (must be frozen Michelina’s), and ANYTHING WITH SUGAR. That’s what worries me…she’s definitely got my sweet tooth and LOOOOOOVES chocolate. I really wish she would eat A vegetable. We are hoping that with her helping plant in the garden this year, she’ll be more inclined to eat what grows.
She is really interested in letters and the sounds that different letters make. She’s constantly asking “What does that start with? What does that sound like?” I love it when she asks “What does T start with?” She’s getting really good at pointing at letters and telling me what they are… And I do think she has a photographic memory sometimes. I can read her a book for the first time and then ask her to read it to me, and darned if she doesn’t remember what each page said! It’s amazing to me to witness how her brain works.
She LOVES movies. I think she has seen Bolt approximately 309486723 times. We have grown quite the DVD collection from the $5 bin at Wal-Mart. She is destined for the entertainment world - loves to sing and dance and PERFORM. I wish I had cameras in my eyes sometimes - when I catch her "acting" or making crazy, expressive faces. She definitely has a lot of contact in the entertainment biz already...so maybe she will be a drama kid. She's in Dance Class once a week at The Dance Studio with "Mrs. Tassa" - she LOVES it. I'll do another post soon to catch you guys up on some pictures and videos - although if you are friends with me on Facebook, you have seen them all.
I really need to do better about writing things down that she says...
The other day as Toby was tilling up the yard for the new garden, my Dad walked over and asked Stella what they were doing. She told him they were planting a garden and the she was going to grow carrots in her garden and Dada was going to grow meatloaf in his garden.
Stuff like that I need to have a notebook and pen handy at all times!!
So, that's my first "I'm back" post for Stephanie's Addiction. I promise to be back here on a regular basis. I still have a lot of news to share but will do so in the next week or so as things calm down a bit...
Life is getting back to normal - only it's a better normal. It's been a rough 1.5 years...but it was all in the Master plan. My faith is stronger now and that's an amazing thing!
Saturday, April 17, 2010
Saturday, February 06, 2010
Monday, June 29, 2009
This is a hard one.
I have thought about this alot and I am going to take a hiatus from "Stephanie's Addiction." This may come as a shock to many of you as I have not been able to contact everyone. So, if you are a real friend of mine and I have not e-mailed or called you, PLEASE accept my apologies. I've been a bit Crazy - with a capital C.
Toby and I have decided to separate to work on our marriage how it SHOULD be worked on. I am obviously not going to go into details here on this public blog, so if you are a friend of mine, please feel free to e-mail or call me and I will be glad to talk to you. I could use the support!
I am fine. I truly am. This is a GOOD thing - even if it is hard as hell. I am sad and heartbroken, yet at the same time excited and hopeful that this is happening.
Toby and I are partners in this process. We are communicating better than before and are going to work our asses off to make this work as best as we can for Stella. We are going to still be doing things as a family with her. There are no ill feelings between us about this. It's just time to turn this ship around and head in a new direction.
This blog began with our wedding and I do not feel right continuing while things are a bit out of whack. I am hopeful that I will be back here in time. Telling poop stories and posting pictures. But I refuse to say when that will be. One day at a time.
Please friend me on Facebook if you want to keep up with Stella pictures and my boring day-to-day status updates. Like the one yesterday where I talked about how the grilled bread on my sandwich at Nordstrom's Cafe cut the inside of my mouth all up. You know you wanna know!!
Thank you to everyone for your support and prayers.
Love, Stephanie
Toby and I have decided to separate to work on our marriage how it SHOULD be worked on. I am obviously not going to go into details here on this public blog, so if you are a friend of mine, please feel free to e-mail or call me and I will be glad to talk to you. I could use the support!
I am fine. I truly am. This is a GOOD thing - even if it is hard as hell. I am sad and heartbroken, yet at the same time excited and hopeful that this is happening.
Toby and I are partners in this process. We are communicating better than before and are going to work our asses off to make this work as best as we can for Stella. We are going to still be doing things as a family with her. There are no ill feelings between us about this. It's just time to turn this ship around and head in a new direction.
This blog began with our wedding and I do not feel right continuing while things are a bit out of whack. I am hopeful that I will be back here in time. Telling poop stories and posting pictures. But I refuse to say when that will be. One day at a time.
Please friend me on Facebook if you want to keep up with Stella pictures and my boring day-to-day status updates. Like the one yesterday where I talked about how the grilled bread on my sandwich at Nordstrom's Cafe cut the inside of my mouth all up. You know you wanna know!!
Thank you to everyone for your support and prayers.
Love, Stephanie
Monday, June 15, 2009
How does your garden grow?
Well, it's definitely not MY garden or it would be a pile of dead, brown plant carcasses. This is all Toby's work. And it's amazing!!
He picked the first zucchini the other night and I made a big batch of zucchini bread. I added berries and raisins in order to try and sneak a few more nutritious things into Stella's diet - since she only eats pancakes and mac n cheese.
Tonight, Stella and Toby picked green beans and snapped them together. We were hoping that if Stella was involved in the growing and preparing of the veggies, there would be a chance she might eat them.
Nope.
But we sure did! It was delicious! Tilapia on the grill, fingerling potatoes, green beans, and zucchini bread.
And in the top lefthand corner, you will notice my new obsession: my tervis tumbler!!
I discovered Tervis Tumblers last month while shopping for a gift at Bed Bath and Beyond. I have been on a search for a great water cup/bottle/jug/whatever that fits in a cup holder, has a straw, does not sweat, and is easy to transport. Apparently, that is a tall order to fill! But I finally found what I have been looking for - and I am in love!
I bought a clear one with a top and straws from BB&B. I noticed the brand on the cup so I looked it up online and found their website. Low and behold, you can personalize them with pictures, your initials, etc... Now I'm really in love!
I got a 16 oz one with a pink breast cancer ribbon with a travel top for tea and coffee. (Yes, they are good for hot and cold beverages and DAMN I should work for them. I already looked - they are based out of Florida and I'm not moving there. My hair does NOTHING in that humidity.)
I got this 24 oz one with the cute girl pirate skull for my water/seltzer/iced tea beverages. No soda will ever fill these jewels. My love for the Tervis Tumbler is really helping me to get my daily water in and I highly recommend them.
Garden? Vegetables? Daily water intake? I am WELL on my way to healthy lifestyle.
Now what can I buy or plant that will exercise FOR me? Hmmmm.....
Thursday, June 11, 2009
It was bound to happen at some point...
Poop. In the unna-wears. In a hot parking lot. With no plastic bags with which to contain the teeny tiny tinkerbell panties full of POOP.
And why can't I have a decent blog entry that does not have me cleaning up POOP?!?!
Stella started Summer Camp this week at the pre-school she will be attending the fall. Can I just say I LOVE SUMMER CAMP. And she loves it too. Which is most important...but I sure do love my 3 hours of alone time every morning.
The first day, Mom went with me and we dropped off the girl and of course I had a short crying moment but it wasn't too bad. Mom treated me to an iced coffee at Starbucks and then we ran a couple errands at Michael's and Trader Joe's.
Here she is before we left the house:
And when we drop them off, we really DROP THEM OFF. The teacher gets them out of the car and puts them back in later! It's a pretty sweet assembly line!
The second day, I went by myself and had another small crying moment. (Unsolicited advice: NEVER look in the rearview after you drop your kid off because you will see their cute little self carrying their polka dotted monogrammed lunchbag up the long sidewalk into the building; with her little ponytail bouncing and her teeny little tennis shoes and.... you get my point.) After that drop-off, I came straight home and cleaned the house really, really good. I mean scrubbed-the-shower-and-mopped-the-kitchen-floor good.
The third day? I was all up in Barnes and Nobles for 3 hours with a new book and a soy latte!!!! Now, that's more like it!
The third day felt so good I did it again on the fourth day (today)! But today I got my latte through the drive-thru and went to the Dumbarton library. Uh, I think I'll go back to B&N next time. The people there are less...strange.
Next week, I will use the time to get back in the gym. I have taken a hiatus this week for some reason... just not into it. I think I needed a mental and physical break (see previous post) but I'm ready to get back and get moving. The book I have been reading the past 2 days is "The Complete Beck Diet for Life" and I swear this lady wrote this book for me. I'll go into more detail at another time and after I have more time to actually practice the techniques. But it sure is making sense.
ANYWAY, back to the poop!! I know you are dying to hear!
I picked Stella up from camp today and we drove immediately to Feathernester's for lunch. (Which reminds me - didn't I have an incident in the Feathernester's parking lot last week? Overhearing a conversation involving a Machete?)
I go to get Stella out of her carseat and a putrid smell wafts up my nose and NO WAY is that MY child. I mean, she has NEVER had a poop incident in her "unna-wears!" There must be dog poop on my shoe or something - so I check my shoes - and they are clean... But she's so particular these days about having to be changed IMMEDIATELY if she pees even a squirt in her pants... no way would she be sitting on a giant turd and not tell me or her teachers?!?!
Wrong.
I stand her up in the parking lot and take a peak down the back of her pants. (Mothers, can you feel me?) And I see the giant ball of poop. Just so happens I was also on the phone with one of my old bosses who is in town and wanted to have dinner. I told him I was "so upset but I can't meet because I am going to see the Indigo Girls tonight at Lewis Ginter and AHHHHHHHH! Uh Wayne, I've gotta go. Stella's had an accident."
Little did he know.
Did you know that it's really damn hard to pull down shorts AND teeny tiny underwear full of poop and get them off of your child while she is wearing tennis shoes?
I manage to get them both off with just one little smear of poop on the back of her calf. So, 90% success, I'd say. Luckily, I carry TWO sets of clothes in the car so we were covered there. I wipe her up real good and get her new underwear and shorts on.
Now...what to do with the pile of poop in the underwear? Surely there are trashcans in front of the stores along this strip on the way to Feathernesters.
Well, surely NOT.
I start to panic a bit wondering where in the world am I going to put this load? NOT back in my car. I was about to toss it in the middle of Lakeside Avenue (not really - but the thought did cross my mind) when I saw a lone trashcan amoungst all of the GORGEOUS plants and statues and decorations on Feathernester's porch area.
I put the "package" in the can but it was rather full so it was on top. I couldn't push it down in there under stuff because it had one of those swinging lids and...well, the logistics weren't good. I'll just put it that way. So I left the load on top and walked into the shop, feeling SOOOOO sorry for the poor gay man who was going to take that top off the can to change the bag and see the worst Tinkerbell scene imaginable! Can you hear his screams now? I can.
We walked into Feathernester's and our party was already at the table. It was the same group from last week with the addition of some family friends. I sat down and tried to read the menu but the guilt was palpable. I couldn't even concentrate. How could I do that to my favorite little shop? My Birdcage shop owners (AKA 2 fabulous gay men?) I was just envisioning them walking out at the end of the day to clean up the patio and turn the "Open" sign to "Closed" and being knocked out by the poop stench that had been cooking in the hot trash can for hours.
I got up and went to the counter and asked one of the owners if I could have a little plastic bag because of a "diaper incident."
I didn't go into details.
So the "suprise" is still in the can, but atleast it's wrapped in plastic now. And I thoroughly enjoyed my lunch.
And I must go now because Stella just got up from her nap. She still wears a pull-up for naptime and bedtime and THANK GOD because I kid you not - she just yelled from her room:
"Mama, I got poops!"
And why can't I have a decent blog entry that does not have me cleaning up POOP?!?!
Stella started Summer Camp this week at the pre-school she will be attending the fall. Can I just say I LOVE SUMMER CAMP. And she loves it too. Which is most important...but I sure do love my 3 hours of alone time every morning.
The first day, Mom went with me and we dropped off the girl and of course I had a short crying moment but it wasn't too bad. Mom treated me to an iced coffee at Starbucks and then we ran a couple errands at Michael's and Trader Joe's.
Here she is before we left the house:
And when we drop them off, we really DROP THEM OFF. The teacher gets them out of the car and puts them back in later! It's a pretty sweet assembly line!
The second day, I went by myself and had another small crying moment. (Unsolicited advice: NEVER look in the rearview after you drop your kid off because you will see their cute little self carrying their polka dotted monogrammed lunchbag up the long sidewalk into the building; with her little ponytail bouncing and her teeny little tennis shoes and.... you get my point.) After that drop-off, I came straight home and cleaned the house really, really good. I mean scrubbed-the-shower-and-mopped-the-kitchen-floor good.
The third day? I was all up in Barnes and Nobles for 3 hours with a new book and a soy latte!!!! Now, that's more like it!
The third day felt so good I did it again on the fourth day (today)! But today I got my latte through the drive-thru and went to the Dumbarton library. Uh, I think I'll go back to B&N next time. The people there are less...strange.
Next week, I will use the time to get back in the gym. I have taken a hiatus this week for some reason... just not into it. I think I needed a mental and physical break (see previous post) but I'm ready to get back and get moving. The book I have been reading the past 2 days is "The Complete Beck Diet for Life" and I swear this lady wrote this book for me. I'll go into more detail at another time and after I have more time to actually practice the techniques. But it sure is making sense.
ANYWAY, back to the poop!! I know you are dying to hear!
I picked Stella up from camp today and we drove immediately to Feathernester's for lunch. (Which reminds me - didn't I have an incident in the Feathernester's parking lot last week? Overhearing a conversation involving a Machete?)
I go to get Stella out of her carseat and a putrid smell wafts up my nose and NO WAY is that MY child. I mean, she has NEVER had a poop incident in her "unna-wears!" There must be dog poop on my shoe or something - so I check my shoes - and they are clean... But she's so particular these days about having to be changed IMMEDIATELY if she pees even a squirt in her pants... no way would she be sitting on a giant turd and not tell me or her teachers?!?!
Wrong.
I stand her up in the parking lot and take a peak down the back of her pants. (Mothers, can you feel me?) And I see the giant ball of poop. Just so happens I was also on the phone with one of my old bosses who is in town and wanted to have dinner. I told him I was "so upset but I can't meet because I am going to see the Indigo Girls tonight at Lewis Ginter and AHHHHHHHH! Uh Wayne, I've gotta go. Stella's had an accident."
Little did he know.
Did you know that it's really damn hard to pull down shorts AND teeny tiny underwear full of poop and get them off of your child while she is wearing tennis shoes?
I manage to get them both off with just one little smear of poop on the back of her calf. So, 90% success, I'd say. Luckily, I carry TWO sets of clothes in the car so we were covered there. I wipe her up real good and get her new underwear and shorts on.
Now...what to do with the pile of poop in the underwear? Surely there are trashcans in front of the stores along this strip on the way to Feathernesters.
Well, surely NOT.
I start to panic a bit wondering where in the world am I going to put this load? NOT back in my car. I was about to toss it in the middle of Lakeside Avenue (not really - but the thought did cross my mind) when I saw a lone trashcan amoungst all of the GORGEOUS plants and statues and decorations on Feathernester's porch area.
I put the "package" in the can but it was rather full so it was on top. I couldn't push it down in there under stuff because it had one of those swinging lids and...well, the logistics weren't good. I'll just put it that way. So I left the load on top and walked into the shop, feeling SOOOOO sorry for the poor gay man who was going to take that top off the can to change the bag and see the worst Tinkerbell scene imaginable! Can you hear his screams now? I can.
We walked into Feathernester's and our party was already at the table. It was the same group from last week with the addition of some family friends. I sat down and tried to read the menu but the guilt was palpable. I couldn't even concentrate. How could I do that to my favorite little shop? My Birdcage shop owners (AKA 2 fabulous gay men?) I was just envisioning them walking out at the end of the day to clean up the patio and turn the "Open" sign to "Closed" and being knocked out by the poop stench that had been cooking in the hot trash can for hours.
I got up and went to the counter and asked one of the owners if I could have a little plastic bag because of a "diaper incident."
I didn't go into details.
So the "suprise" is still in the can, but atleast it's wrapped in plastic now. And I thoroughly enjoyed my lunch.
And I must go now because Stella just got up from her nap. She still wears a pull-up for naptime and bedtime and THANK GOD because I kid you not - she just yelled from her room:
"Mama, I got poops!"
Tuesday, June 09, 2009
Thoughts for Today
I have been thinking today about my weight loss journey and my lack of success for the past 4 years. I know it's ME and my constant search (whether it's unconscious or not) for a way to cheat the system and either not exercise or sneak food or round down the points or "forget" the 500 calorie snack I had or ALL OF THE ABOVE. I think I am constantly in search of the perfect plan. And I find a plan that I am sure is THE plan and I plan my meals and my exercise and when I don't follow through on my plan I beat myself up and go hog wild for a bit until I feel like total arse mentally and physically so then I start to plan again and....vicious cycle. I can't tell you how many binders, and spreadsheets, and journals, and notebooks, and BLAH. It's ridiculous.
There is TOO much info out there about food, diet, supplements, exercise, etc. I'm always thinking what I am doing is not "right" and that there has to be another combination that is THE answer. So I might as well not work too hard on THIS plan since there has to be a better one out there.
But what about LIVING. What about just LIVING LIFE? What about just making sure you move every day and that you eat as natural as possible? What about not thinking about this 24/7? What about not weighing yourself all the time and just going by the pants-o-meter? What about going by HOW YOU FEEL only?
It sounds so foreign - yet so refreshing.
There is TOO much info out there about food, diet, supplements, exercise, etc. I'm always thinking what I am doing is not "right" and that there has to be another combination that is THE answer. So I might as well not work too hard on THIS plan since there has to be a better one out there.
But what about LIVING. What about just LIVING LIFE? What about just making sure you move every day and that you eat as natural as possible? What about not thinking about this 24/7? What about not weighing yourself all the time and just going by the pants-o-meter? What about going by HOW YOU FEEL only?
It sounds so foreign - yet so refreshing.
Thursday, June 04, 2009
It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood...
We really do have the best neighborhood.
But even the best neighborhood has it's quirks. Some days around here are just pure soap opera. Or Cops. It depends... I really wasn't aware of all of the stuff going on while I was working but now that I am unemployed, I'm all up in it!
On the right side, we have my parents. And while they call themselves "Frank and Marie" from "Everybody Loves Raymond", they are far from it. We love having them next door and I really love it that now I can let Stella out the front door and watch her run across the yards to her grandparents' house. It's really cool.
Across from us are Mr. and Mrs. Lowery. Stella LOVES them and has adopted them as another set of grandparents - and I think they have adopted her as well. Until recently, she could not say "Mrs. Lowery" and it came out "Busy Body" which is HYSTERICAL for reasons I will explain later... Lately, it has become more like "Mrs. Lowery" which kind of makes me sad. The really funny part is that she is so polite and uses the proper name for Mrs. Lowery, but for her husband, she simply calls him "Bob" and has since she was teeny. One day, we were pulling her in the wagon and she just yelled "Hi, Bob!" And he was so tickled by it, it just stuck. She loves Mrs. Lowery and Bob. They have a little dog named Baby that Stella also loves to play with (AKA terrorize.)
Two doors down from The Lowerys are Floyd and Linda. Linda and Mrs. Lowery walk Baby around the neighborhood twice a day, promptly at 9am and 3pm. They are like clockwork. This is when they get the neighborhood happenings. Bob spends a lot of time in a lawn chair in the drive way reading books or the newspaper - but I think it's just a front. He's really checking out the neighborhood haps as well. A lot of days, Toby joins him. ;)
On their right is Mrs. Brittle. On her right, is Joy. She is a master gardner and is a librarian. She wears a big floppy hat while doing yardwork which has earned her the nickname from Toby, "Floppy Hat." He is incredibly creative.
Then there is Warren. He lives a few blocks down and he is a bachelor, probably in his 60's. Everything he owns is in amazing condition. He rode his motorcycle up one day and I said "Got you a new bike?" and he said "Lord, I've had this since the 70's." He spends his days riding his bike for hours and hours (not his motorcycle - a bike - so he is in great shape) and visiting friends.
And at the end of our street is Jane. She is also a master gardner and it shows. She has taught Toby a few things about our yard and our gardens that are thriving now.
Around the corner are Chad and Chris. They are a really cool gay couple who just built an amazing house. It's mostly green - everything recycled and refurbished. The siding on the house used to be an old barn in Wisconsin. The doors are from some fancy place. Lots of antiques mixed with modern decor. Toby has been helping them put up a new fence and he has gotten to be good buddies with Chad especially.
Every.Single.Night, from about 5pm - 8pm, all of the above characters get together in the Lowery's driveway. It's a huge circle of lawn chairs. Toby takes Stella over there nearly every night and I go over sometimes...I laugh because I wonder "What the hell do they have to talk about?!?" But I guess it's plenty!
We have quite a few "interesting" characters here too...but I'll just tell you about one right now. Since it's fresh in my mind.
The house next to the Lowery's is owned by a single lady. She works at some community organization and has a big heart - sometimes too big. She has had lots of roommates over the years - people she runs across at work who need places to live. This is nice, HOWEVER, these people are strange.
Right now, her roommate is Jodi. Jodi is a little asian lady with a big dalmation dog. She "walks" her dog by holding her leash out the driver's side window of her car while she rides up and down the street. She also walks around and collects sticks to burn in their stove. Not sure what kind of set up they have over there...and I think I'll continue to leave it up to my imagination.
Recently, Jodi has started having a friend over. I'm sorry, but this dude is sketchy.
Every day he rides in on his bike with a different tool. One day, he was carrying a weed eater as he pedaled. The next day it was a skill saw. It makes you wonder where the heck he is getting these tools and why does he need to ride around with them?
Yesterday, Stella and I had lunch with Mom, my grandma, my aunts, and a cousin at a little boutique shop called Feathernesters, which is a few blocks away from the house. We parked in the lot and were walking to the store. We walked past a shop called "Tool Guys" which sells used/refurbished tools.
Jodi's friend was standing outside the shop when the owner walked out and I overheard him ask
"Hey, are you guys going to put a price on that marchetti in the back?"
Marchetti.
I can't wait to tell Mrs. Lowery!
But even the best neighborhood has it's quirks. Some days around here are just pure soap opera. Or Cops. It depends... I really wasn't aware of all of the stuff going on while I was working but now that I am unemployed, I'm all up in it!
On the right side, we have my parents. And while they call themselves "Frank and Marie" from "Everybody Loves Raymond", they are far from it. We love having them next door and I really love it that now I can let Stella out the front door and watch her run across the yards to her grandparents' house. It's really cool.
Across from us are Mr. and Mrs. Lowery. Stella LOVES them and has adopted them as another set of grandparents - and I think they have adopted her as well. Until recently, she could not say "Mrs. Lowery" and it came out "Busy Body" which is HYSTERICAL for reasons I will explain later... Lately, it has become more like "Mrs. Lowery" which kind of makes me sad. The really funny part is that she is so polite and uses the proper name for Mrs. Lowery, but for her husband, she simply calls him "Bob" and has since she was teeny. One day, we were pulling her in the wagon and she just yelled "Hi, Bob!" And he was so tickled by it, it just stuck. She loves Mrs. Lowery and Bob. They have a little dog named Baby that Stella also loves to play with (AKA terrorize.)
Two doors down from The Lowerys are Floyd and Linda. Linda and Mrs. Lowery walk Baby around the neighborhood twice a day, promptly at 9am and 3pm. They are like clockwork. This is when they get the neighborhood happenings. Bob spends a lot of time in a lawn chair in the drive way reading books or the newspaper - but I think it's just a front. He's really checking out the neighborhood haps as well. A lot of days, Toby joins him. ;)
On their right is Mrs. Brittle. On her right, is Joy. She is a master gardner and is a librarian. She wears a big floppy hat while doing yardwork which has earned her the nickname from Toby, "Floppy Hat." He is incredibly creative.
Then there is Warren. He lives a few blocks down and he is a bachelor, probably in his 60's. Everything he owns is in amazing condition. He rode his motorcycle up one day and I said "Got you a new bike?" and he said "Lord, I've had this since the 70's." He spends his days riding his bike for hours and hours (not his motorcycle - a bike - so he is in great shape) and visiting friends.
And at the end of our street is Jane. She is also a master gardner and it shows. She has taught Toby a few things about our yard and our gardens that are thriving now.
Around the corner are Chad and Chris. They are a really cool gay couple who just built an amazing house. It's mostly green - everything recycled and refurbished. The siding on the house used to be an old barn in Wisconsin. The doors are from some fancy place. Lots of antiques mixed with modern decor. Toby has been helping them put up a new fence and he has gotten to be good buddies with Chad especially.
Every.Single.Night, from about 5pm - 8pm, all of the above characters get together in the Lowery's driveway. It's a huge circle of lawn chairs. Toby takes Stella over there nearly every night and I go over sometimes...I laugh because I wonder "What the hell do they have to talk about?!?" But I guess it's plenty!
We have quite a few "interesting" characters here too...but I'll just tell you about one right now. Since it's fresh in my mind.
The house next to the Lowery's is owned by a single lady. She works at some community organization and has a big heart - sometimes too big. She has had lots of roommates over the years - people she runs across at work who need places to live. This is nice, HOWEVER, these people are strange.
Right now, her roommate is Jodi. Jodi is a little asian lady with a big dalmation dog. She "walks" her dog by holding her leash out the driver's side window of her car while she rides up and down the street. She also walks around and collects sticks to burn in their stove. Not sure what kind of set up they have over there...and I think I'll continue to leave it up to my imagination.
Recently, Jodi has started having a friend over. I'm sorry, but this dude is sketchy.
Every day he rides in on his bike with a different tool. One day, he was carrying a weed eater as he pedaled. The next day it was a skill saw. It makes you wonder where the heck he is getting these tools and why does he need to ride around with them?
Yesterday, Stella and I had lunch with Mom, my grandma, my aunts, and a cousin at a little boutique shop called Feathernesters, which is a few blocks away from the house. We parked in the lot and were walking to the store. We walked past a shop called "Tool Guys" which sells used/refurbished tools.
Jodi's friend was standing outside the shop when the owner walked out and I overheard him ask
"Hey, are you guys going to put a price on that marchetti in the back?"
Marchetti.
I can't wait to tell Mrs. Lowery!
Monday, June 01, 2009
Memorial Day = Saved
Memorial Day ended up being pretty good - much to our surprise. Our friends Heath and Julie decided to come over anyway and we fixed an AWESOME meal.
Stella just layed in our bed and watched her shows. She really was like a wet noodle - no energy at all. Heath went in to talk to her at one point and was asking her lots of questions - Are you feeling bad? Does your tummy hurt? Do you want anything to eat? She wasn't answering. Then he asked "Do you want me to leave you alone?" to which she promptly answered, "Yes."
Alrighty then!
Here are the italian sausages with peppers, onions, and cheese. They were so good they deserved to be documented!
Heath getting ready to feast. He was VERY happy.
Toby was happy too.
The happy to-be-married-in-October couple.
My view of Stella from the table... So pitiful!
On Tuesday morning, we took a trip to the pediatrician. Always a joy. She took one look at her throat and said "Whoa! Definitely strep." Although the quick test came back negative, she was sure the culture would come back in a couple days as strep so she gave us a prescription for an antibiotic - NOT the one from last time just incase anyone needs a refresher.
She took it for 2 days and then we stopped because the culture came back negative as well. Interesting. She seems to be good as new now so who knows what it was... Her father has a man cold right now so maybe it was something alone those lines...cold/allergies.
Stella is a champ when she is sick though. She just lays around and rests. She doesn't go "UUUUGGGGHHHHHH" every 3 seconds like someone else who lives in this house who is not me. Anyway! ;)
The battery on this laptop is about to die and I have a pile of laundry calling my name so more to come - TOMORROW.
Do you hear me? TOMORROW.
Stella just layed in our bed and watched her shows. She really was like a wet noodle - no energy at all. Heath went in to talk to her at one point and was asking her lots of questions - Are you feeling bad? Does your tummy hurt? Do you want anything to eat? She wasn't answering. Then he asked "Do you want me to leave you alone?" to which she promptly answered, "Yes."
Alrighty then!
Here are the italian sausages with peppers, onions, and cheese. They were so good they deserved to be documented!
Heath getting ready to feast. He was VERY happy.
Toby was happy too.
The happy to-be-married-in-October couple.
My view of Stella from the table... So pitiful!
On Tuesday morning, we took a trip to the pediatrician. Always a joy. She took one look at her throat and said "Whoa! Definitely strep." Although the quick test came back negative, she was sure the culture would come back in a couple days as strep so she gave us a prescription for an antibiotic - NOT the one from last time just incase anyone needs a refresher.
She took it for 2 days and then we stopped because the culture came back negative as well. Interesting. She seems to be good as new now so who knows what it was... Her father has a man cold right now so maybe it was something alone those lines...cold/allergies.
Stella is a champ when she is sick though. She just lays around and rests. She doesn't go "UUUUGGGGHHHHHH" every 3 seconds like someone else who lives in this house who is not me. Anyway! ;)
The battery on this laptop is about to die and I have a pile of laundry calling my name so more to come - TOMORROW.
Do you hear me? TOMORROW.
Monday, May 25, 2009
Sunday, May 24, 2009
Life Lesson # 23746
When you go to a formal event (ie: wedding) where you have to wear a dress that is tight-ish and you must wear an arsenal of undergarmets (ie: a modern-day girdle from boobs to knees), be sure to bring a purse that is big enough to put the stupid thing in when you get SICK AND TIRED of wrestling with yourself in a small bathroom stall that you have to visit every 3 minutes because you are drinking beer and you broke the seal way too early in the evening.
Because by the time you drink enough beer, you don't give a hoot if your stomach is hanging out or not. And neither does anyone else.
Because by the time you drink enough beer, you don't give a hoot if your stomach is hanging out or not. And neither does anyone else.
Monday, May 18, 2009
Loving Life...
Current scene: Me. And laptop. On my deck. Sitting at my newly lysol wiped glass table. The lovely scent of dryer sheets wafting up my nose (since I am about 1.5 feet from the dryer vent.) Watching Stella play in her fuc- I mean, froggy sandbox.
As Stella would say "It's a beautiful sunny day, Mama!" But it's actually pretty chilly... If I was smart, I would get in a neighborhood walk while there's a nice chill in the air...but alas, I don't feel smart today. Maybe tomorrow.
So, a lot of time has passed and no entries from me. It's not for lack of happenings - just lack of desire to record those happenings. I really need to be better about documenting Stella-isms because they come and go so quickly. Stuff I say I'll never forget - I already have. But the other stuff? I really doubt that you guys care to hear about my endless search for tennis shoes that don't give me shin splints or my inability to spend less than $50 at Target every-time-I-go-no-matter-how-hard-I-try.
I think that should be an olympic sport...or a new reality show.
Are YOU up for the Ultimate Challenge of spending less than $50 at Target when all you go in for are lightbulbs and deoderant?!?!
I think it would be an instant hit.
Anywho... life is good! It really is. I'm really trying to enjoy this time and savor it. Don't get me wrong - it's not a walk in the park all the time. Some days, Stella and I are at each other's throats! Which kind of makes me laugh because, I mean, she's TWO. But shoot, I'm not laughing AT ALL when it's "one of those days."
Oh my Lord. My child just walked up to me and she looks like the lady in the Rice Krispy Treats commercial who throws flour all over herself to make it look like she worked really hard in the kitchen...what kind of sand is this anyway? She looks like a ghost!!! Great!
What was I saying about "one of those days??"
No, it's wonderful. I love being at home with her. I love running errands with her. I love how she says HI to every single person we pass in the store and when they don't say hi she says "They no say hi to me, Mama!" and I say "That's ok, babe. They are just old and rude." It's fun! ;) She's truly my best friend.
She's doing other funny stuff that I want to remember...
She is still singing everything (Broadway bound!) And she makes up songs for every day situations like "the underwear song" which goes "Underwear Underwear bom bom bom." (Future grammy winning songwriter too!) And she talks on her little cell phone to Mimi and to Uncle Matt and has "real" conversations with them, pausing to listen to their side and nods in agreement and says "mmm hmm" at the important parts. Such an imagination - destined for greatness, I am sure of it!
She's very sweet and thoughtful when she wants to be. She picks flowers for me and Neh-Neh and Dada and Mrs. Lowery (our neighbor.) When she's eating a snack (ex: goldfish) she'll put a few aside and tell me "These are for Bapaw" and she'll point her finger at me and say "No eat them!" She knows me too well, I guess...
She LOVES her Dada. When he is play chasing her she screams and giggles and sings "No get me!"
She LOVES to be outside - she would LIVE outside 24/7 if we would let her. I really think she would be totally content if we got her a big pile of rocks for her birthday. Pretty soon we won't have any rocks left in the driveway.
She is SO smart and talkative. When I was pregnant, my Dad used to get a kick of out that car commercial where the Dad is strapping his little girl in her carseat in the back and she's talking talking talking and she won't pause long enough for him to shut the door to run around to his side so he finally just shuts the door while she's talking and runs around and opens his door and climbs in and she's still just steadily talking.... Dad used to say "I wonder if Stella will be like that?" I can answer that question now with a resounding: YES.
And even through all the talking, she can not say "S."
stars = tars
I ask her every night if she wants the bird mobile or the stars on the ceiling and she always says "Just tars."
She's not Stella; she's Tella. Or Tessa. (We call her Stessa....)
And my personal (not so) favorite is "Top that, Mama!" which she says 32498756320 times a day.
She still talks like a caveman with "me" instead of "I."
"Me do it myself!"
"Me want some dooce!" (that's juice)
"Me go night night." That's my FAVORITE!! ;) Those words are music to my ears!
To sum it up, she's my precious, joyful, genius, beautiful, talented, pint-sized buddy.
Here are some pictures:
She looks like such a teenager here to me! (I hope she's not sucking her fingers into her teens though...)
As Stella would say "It's a beautiful sunny day, Mama!" But it's actually pretty chilly... If I was smart, I would get in a neighborhood walk while there's a nice chill in the air...but alas, I don't feel smart today. Maybe tomorrow.
So, a lot of time has passed and no entries from me. It's not for lack of happenings - just lack of desire to record those happenings. I really need to be better about documenting Stella-isms because they come and go so quickly. Stuff I say I'll never forget - I already have. But the other stuff? I really doubt that you guys care to hear about my endless search for tennis shoes that don't give me shin splints or my inability to spend less than $50 at Target every-time-I-go-no-matter-how-hard-I-try.
I think that should be an olympic sport...or a new reality show.
Are YOU up for the Ultimate Challenge of spending less than $50 at Target when all you go in for are lightbulbs and deoderant?!?!
I think it would be an instant hit.
Anywho... life is good! It really is. I'm really trying to enjoy this time and savor it. Don't get me wrong - it's not a walk in the park all the time. Some days, Stella and I are at each other's throats! Which kind of makes me laugh because, I mean, she's TWO. But shoot, I'm not laughing AT ALL when it's "one of those days."
Oh my Lord. My child just walked up to me and she looks like the lady in the Rice Krispy Treats commercial who throws flour all over herself to make it look like she worked really hard in the kitchen...what kind of sand is this anyway? She looks like a ghost!!! Great!
What was I saying about "one of those days??"
No, it's wonderful. I love being at home with her. I love running errands with her. I love how she says HI to every single person we pass in the store and when they don't say hi she says "They no say hi to me, Mama!" and I say "That's ok, babe. They are just old and rude." It's fun! ;) She's truly my best friend.
She's doing other funny stuff that I want to remember...
She is still singing everything (Broadway bound!) And she makes up songs for every day situations like "the underwear song" which goes "Underwear Underwear bom bom bom." (Future grammy winning songwriter too!) And she talks on her little cell phone to Mimi and to Uncle Matt and has "real" conversations with them, pausing to listen to their side and nods in agreement and says "mmm hmm" at the important parts. Such an imagination - destined for greatness, I am sure of it!
She's very sweet and thoughtful when she wants to be. She picks flowers for me and Neh-Neh and Dada and Mrs. Lowery (our neighbor.) When she's eating a snack (ex: goldfish) she'll put a few aside and tell me "These are for Bapaw" and she'll point her finger at me and say "No eat them!" She knows me too well, I guess...
She LOVES her Dada. When he is play chasing her she screams and giggles and sings "No get me!"
She LOVES to be outside - she would LIVE outside 24/7 if we would let her. I really think she would be totally content if we got her a big pile of rocks for her birthday. Pretty soon we won't have any rocks left in the driveway.
She is SO smart and talkative. When I was pregnant, my Dad used to get a kick of out that car commercial where the Dad is strapping his little girl in her carseat in the back and she's talking talking talking and she won't pause long enough for him to shut the door to run around to his side so he finally just shuts the door while she's talking and runs around and opens his door and climbs in and she's still just steadily talking.... Dad used to say "I wonder if Stella will be like that?" I can answer that question now with a resounding: YES.
And even through all the talking, she can not say "S."
stars = tars
I ask her every night if she wants the bird mobile or the stars on the ceiling and she always says "Just tars."
She's not Stella; she's Tella. Or Tessa. (We call her Stessa....)
And my personal (not so) favorite is "Top that, Mama!" which she says 32498756320 times a day.
She still talks like a caveman with "me" instead of "I."
"Me do it myself!"
"Me want some dooce!" (that's juice)
"Me go night night." That's my FAVORITE!! ;) Those words are music to my ears!
To sum it up, she's my precious, joyful, genius, beautiful, talented, pint-sized buddy.
Here are some pictures:
With her angel art by Carol Bock.
One of the aforementioned Target trips where I am SURE those sunglasses were not on my list.
Proof of "one of those days." Hurricane Stella in full effect.
She looks like such a teenager here to me! (I hope she's not sucking her fingers into her teens though...)
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Uncle Donnie, May 14, 2009
Darling Stella O,
I've just returned from Korea for the second time - I'm working with Korean costume makers on the United States production of Dream Girls this time. On my last night, Miss Cho - who is in charge of the costume shop - took me and the other US team members along with her staff out for a traditional korean dinner. I found this little dresser mirror at a street vendor's stand and thought you should have it - after all, a lady always takes care to look her best!!! The mirror's back is hand embroidered by someone, no doubt, very close to your age!! Looking forward to seeing you in July at the Duhnam-Wheatley wedding.
All love,
Uncle Donnie
Jobby Job
I just spent all damn day working on a cover letter and resume for a cool sounding job at the Botanical Garden less than a mile from my house. How lucky would I be? A chance to give back to the community and do something with meaning and I could even WALK to work.
Must! Get! This! Job!
My cover letter and resume both emphasize my amazing attention to detail and my eagle-eye proof-reading skills. I go back and forth from the job description to my documents, making sure to sell my incredible skills and bring home just how perfect I am for this position. I am about to hit "send" on the final documents when I glance down at the job description one last time and see the sentence:
"Salary will range in the 20's, depending on experience."
Uh...hells no. I gotta atleast pay for our shelter and our rides, people.
Apparently, my editing skills have been unemployed for way too long to miss THAT sentence. AND I just wasted hours of my life. Hours that could have been devoted to cleaning or napping or eating snacks while watching Dr. Phil.
I don't mean to sound ungrateful. In a few months, I might be begging for that job. But right now, I still have time to look. I have two resumes out there right now for really interesting sounding positions which I will not mention any further for fear of jinxing myself...but say a little prayer for my mystery jobs, will ya?
Whatever will be, will be. I KNOW this. I am OK with this. I'm not scared or worried. But a cool job that does not give me heartburn or clinical depression would be super groovy, eh?
Must! Get! This! Job!
My cover letter and resume both emphasize my amazing attention to detail and my eagle-eye proof-reading skills. I go back and forth from the job description to my documents, making sure to sell my incredible skills and bring home just how perfect I am for this position. I am about to hit "send" on the final documents when I glance down at the job description one last time and see the sentence:
"Salary will range in the 20's, depending on experience."
Uh...hells no. I gotta atleast pay for our shelter and our rides, people.
Apparently, my editing skills have been unemployed for way too long to miss THAT sentence. AND I just wasted hours of my life. Hours that could have been devoted to cleaning or napping or eating snacks while watching Dr. Phil.
I don't mean to sound ungrateful. In a few months, I might be begging for that job. But right now, I still have time to look. I have two resumes out there right now for really interesting sounding positions which I will not mention any further for fear of jinxing myself...but say a little prayer for my mystery jobs, will ya?
Whatever will be, will be. I KNOW this. I am OK with this. I'm not scared or worried. But a cool job that does not give me heartburn or clinical depression would be super groovy, eh?
Monday, April 13, 2009
You know you are sexy when....
...the waistband of your cotton underwear unravels itself in the washer/dryer and wraps itself around 2 pair of your flannel pants, tying them together, and creating a bond so tight that you can lift it all up by the thread and swing it around in the air above your head like you are about to lasso a pig. Or a 2 year old.
Saturday, April 11, 2009
I'm so sick of myself right now.
I am back at Weight Watcher meetings as of a month ago. I have lost 6.2 lbs so far..which is HUGE for me since I am a professional maintainer. Whatever weight I am at - even if it sucks - is where I can stay for years and years - even when I think I am dieting. Weight Watchers give me the accountability and helps me to really think about what I am eating and cut back on the amount. I really do not eat a lot of junk (because I don't keep it in the house!) My issue is portion size.
Well, I guess I could give a rip about a stranger weighing my fat ass this coming Tuesday because I am like a bottomless pit this week. It's so freaking frustrating to me. WHY?????
What is so damn hard about not eating when you are not hungry. I mean, that's elementary, people! Yesterday was the first day in a month where I really felt like total A-S-S from eating too much. And would you like to know how I dealt with those feelings?
I ate over half a box of All Bran Crackers at midnight.
Now I feel like Super A-S-S.
What is holding me back from being successful at weight loss? I don't even want to be skinny. Truly! I just want to be comfortable and not zero in on my gut as soon as my eyeballs hit the mirror. I DO want it. But I guess not bad enough?
But I DO!!
I have said this a bazillion times. If I had a nickel for every time I have been in "this place" I would never had to work again for as long as I live. Either that, or I could afford liposuction of the entire body.
Seriously: Lifestyle Change.
It has to happen. I feel like I have already conquered quite a few demons - so maybe I should focus on those for a moment and relish in the positivity and accomplishments.
1. I do not keep junk food in the house and have not for years. Luckily, Toby is not a snacker so that has helped me. He'll have to get a dorito fix about once a year... Yes, I married an alien.
2. I have pretty much been able to cut out the "extras" like cheese and mayo. I have not eaten cheese on salads in years. And this is the girl who used to eat bowls of cheese, bacon bits, and french dressing. (Actually, my brother invented that "salad" but I remember partaking of a few in my time...)
3. I can't remember the last time I had sweet tea or a real soda.
This one is a biggie:
4. I do not PLAN food "events" anymore. When I lived alone (and was lonely), I used to PLAN my nights of eating. I'd think about it all day. I'd obsess over what I was going to eat along with what I would watch on TV - either a show or a movie. I would stress over what food to get because I didn't want to choose the wrong thing. Like I was never going to eat again - yeah right! My most common binge meal was Taco Bell and Ben and Jerry's. I knew I was going to make myself sick, but it didn't matter. It was good for a few minutes.
I watch enough "Intervention" to know that I am a total addict - just like an alcoholic or a heroin addict. I do think that through hard work over the years, I have changed 85% of that behavior...but yesterday really took me back to that time and I don't want to be "there."
And it's not even because I'm hungry or I want food - Lord knows the food I do have here in the house is not binge-worthy. Three words: All Bran Crackers?!? I mean, come on.
I think it's because I want something to do. Boredom is my worst enemy. I need to learn to knit.
I know what it takes for a lifestyle change. I want to do it! But I DON'T and that is the issue. What in the hell is holding me back. Like Dr. Phil says, "You're getting something out of it if you keep doing it." What am I getting?
Tighter pants.
Too much thinking about tight pants.
A bigger spare tire that I despise.
No energy.
Flab.
Depression and bad moods centered around my fat ass.
Bins and bins of clothes that don't fit taking up all of my storage space.
It doesn't make sense?!?
I need to follow another one of Dr. Phil's mottos and just "fake it till I make it." Another issue with me is if I don't see results immediately, I get discouraged. It's to the point where I work out (aka walk around the neighborhood) for 2 days and I think those too-tight pants should fit now. But they don't. So I stop walking.
For a smart girl, I am an IDIOT when it comes to this mess. It confuses me that I have accomplished so much in my life...yet I continue to find myself in this same situation.
More ponderings later... I'm tired.
I am back at Weight Watcher meetings as of a month ago. I have lost 6.2 lbs so far..which is HUGE for me since I am a professional maintainer. Whatever weight I am at - even if it sucks - is where I can stay for years and years - even when I think I am dieting. Weight Watchers give me the accountability and helps me to really think about what I am eating and cut back on the amount. I really do not eat a lot of junk (because I don't keep it in the house!) My issue is portion size.
Well, I guess I could give a rip about a stranger weighing my fat ass this coming Tuesday because I am like a bottomless pit this week. It's so freaking frustrating to me. WHY?????
What is so damn hard about not eating when you are not hungry. I mean, that's elementary, people! Yesterday was the first day in a month where I really felt like total A-S-S from eating too much. And would you like to know how I dealt with those feelings?
I ate over half a box of All Bran Crackers at midnight.
Now I feel like Super A-S-S.
What is holding me back from being successful at weight loss? I don't even want to be skinny. Truly! I just want to be comfortable and not zero in on my gut as soon as my eyeballs hit the mirror. I DO want it. But I guess not bad enough?
But I DO!!
I have said this a bazillion times. If I had a nickel for every time I have been in "this place" I would never had to work again for as long as I live. Either that, or I could afford liposuction of the entire body.
Seriously: Lifestyle Change.
It has to happen. I feel like I have already conquered quite a few demons - so maybe I should focus on those for a moment and relish in the positivity and accomplishments.
1. I do not keep junk food in the house and have not for years. Luckily, Toby is not a snacker so that has helped me. He'll have to get a dorito fix about once a year... Yes, I married an alien.
2. I have pretty much been able to cut out the "extras" like cheese and mayo. I have not eaten cheese on salads in years. And this is the girl who used to eat bowls of cheese, bacon bits, and french dressing. (Actually, my brother invented that "salad" but I remember partaking of a few in my time...)
3. I can't remember the last time I had sweet tea or a real soda.
This one is a biggie:
4. I do not PLAN food "events" anymore. When I lived alone (and was lonely), I used to PLAN my nights of eating. I'd think about it all day. I'd obsess over what I was going to eat along with what I would watch on TV - either a show or a movie. I would stress over what food to get because I didn't want to choose the wrong thing. Like I was never going to eat again - yeah right! My most common binge meal was Taco Bell and Ben and Jerry's. I knew I was going to make myself sick, but it didn't matter. It was good for a few minutes.
I watch enough "Intervention" to know that I am a total addict - just like an alcoholic or a heroin addict. I do think that through hard work over the years, I have changed 85% of that behavior...but yesterday really took me back to that time and I don't want to be "there."
And it's not even because I'm hungry or I want food - Lord knows the food I do have here in the house is not binge-worthy. Three words: All Bran Crackers?!? I mean, come on.
I think it's because I want something to do. Boredom is my worst enemy. I need to learn to knit.
I know what it takes for a lifestyle change. I want to do it! But I DON'T and that is the issue. What in the hell is holding me back. Like Dr. Phil says, "You're getting something out of it if you keep doing it." What am I getting?
Tighter pants.
Too much thinking about tight pants.
A bigger spare tire that I despise.
No energy.
Flab.
Depression and bad moods centered around my fat ass.
Bins and bins of clothes that don't fit taking up all of my storage space.
It doesn't make sense?!?
I need to follow another one of Dr. Phil's mottos and just "fake it till I make it." Another issue with me is if I don't see results immediately, I get discouraged. It's to the point where I work out (aka walk around the neighborhood) for 2 days and I think those too-tight pants should fit now. But they don't. So I stop walking.
For a smart girl, I am an IDIOT when it comes to this mess. It confuses me that I have accomplished so much in my life...yet I continue to find myself in this same situation.
More ponderings later... I'm tired.
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Fondue Update #1 - Let's hope there isn't a #2. (wink wink)
I bet it will be a long time before you book a romantic dinner at The Melting Pot.
So, we just had another "experience" and you didn't even have to wait until tomorrow for the next installment. How nice of us!
This time when much smoother as Stella said "I've got poop" and without saying a word I hit PAUSE while Simon Cowell was giving his review of Allison and we both wordlessly got up and headed to the crime scene from earlier.
This time was similar, only worse. It had seeped out of the pull-up and was on the nightgown.
But, oh! We were MUCH more prepared. Leave it to my husband - he had pre-fabbed approximately 7 folded squares of toilet paper for easy access and had refilled the wipes dispenser for the cleaning part.
Now we're a team. We should take this show on the road. Or not.
All humor aside, her little parts are horribly irritated so we had to slather some "coochie get-right" as my husband called it and then I peed my pants laughing. Too many accidents in this house today!!
I am not giving her this antibiotic anymore.
So, we just had another "experience" and you didn't even have to wait until tomorrow for the next installment. How nice of us!
This time when much smoother as Stella said "I've got poop" and without saying a word I hit PAUSE while Simon Cowell was giving his review of Allison and we both wordlessly got up and headed to the crime scene from earlier.
This time was similar, only worse. It had seeped out of the pull-up and was on the nightgown.
But, oh! We were MUCH more prepared. Leave it to my husband - he had pre-fabbed approximately 7 folded squares of toilet paper for easy access and had refilled the wipes dispenser for the cleaning part.
Now we're a team. We should take this show on the road. Or not.
All humor aside, her little parts are horribly irritated so we had to slather some "coochie get-right" as my husband called it and then I peed my pants laughing. Too many accidents in this house today!!
I am not giving her this antibiotic anymore.
It was driving me crazy...
...but now I have never been so thankful for a nose that is not working because of a vicious cold. I mean, I can't smell crap. Literally.
Stella has also had a cold/allergies/virus thing going on for about a week or so and is on anti-biotics. I don't know about other children out there but antibiotics make my kid MEAN! There are other fun side effects of antibiotics so we've got her drinking yogurt drinks to avoid the female issues but there is yet another side effect that is unavoidable, unfortunately.
This afternoon has been rather enjoyable. Toby and I are sitting in the living room, enjoying the open windows and the nice weather. He's in his chair studying for his Electrician's Card and I am on the couch browsing Facebook and watching Oprah interview the people on the Yearning for Zion Ranch... totally enjoyable, right?! I hear Stella waking up from her nap so I go to her room and take the gate down (Yes I gate her in. Because if I don't she might sneak out and sit at my vanity and turn on my curling iron and burn her hand. Or whatever.)
So, I go to the kitchen to make my afternoon cup of coffee and I hear her say "I've got poop!" We're doing pull-ups for naps and nighttime so atleast it wasn't underwear.
Thank God it wasn't underwear.
She comes in the kitchen and I tell her to go tell Dada to change her pull-up. She says "No you do it." I say "No go tell Dada" and she says "No you do it" and I say "Go tell Dada!!" So she does.
And of course he doesn't move so finally I say "Come on Stella let's change you." I really wish I had started that spreadsheet I kept threatening... the one to keep track of poop changes and whose turn it is next.
Any new moms reading this? Take that as my first piece of advice.
So anyway, I put her on the changing table and pull down her pants and slowly tear the sides of the pull up and HOLY MARY MOTHER OF GOD it looked like someone dumped a pot of dark chocolate fondue in my child's diaper.
It was all up the front.
All up the back.
And all in there - if you pick up what I'm puttin down.
I say - calmly - "Toby, could you help please?" And he comes bounding around the corner. With a spring in his step like Johnny On the Spot. He rounds the corner and I swear I wish I had a nanny cam in Stella's room to catch this whole scene. We'd be millionaires.
He stops in his tracks and yells OH. MY. GOD. What is THAT?!?!?!? And before he even finishes that sentence, he is gone.
"I need help!!!" I've got both her legs up in one hand trying to keep her from moving a centimeter because the consequences of that, now that the pull-up is open, is unthinkable.
For the next few seconds, he is in panic mode. Just running in and out of the room. Like he doesn't know which way is up. He's yelling stuff. I do remember hearing "Do you want me to run the tub?!?" but that's it. There was a lot of other words. And gagging. And gasping for air. I heard "yard" and "hose" and several other words but it was all just a blur.
But through all this, I'm just standing there. Watching. He puts on a good show sometimes.
Finally he calms down enough to come in and hold her feet in the air while I try and wipe her...but at this point, there is no wiping...it's just shoveling sh*t from her onto the pull-up into a pile. I didn't care if I used a pack and a half of wipes on this one change. But only 4 wipes in, I am met with an empty box.
Toby and I look at each other and understood what needed to happen. No words were spoken.
I grabbed her feet and he went running to get more supplies. He comes back with a roll of toilet paper.
"Noooo!"
"Yes! Just use this so we don't waste wipes. All you're doing is shoveling right now. Then you can use the wipes to clean."
So he's rolling off toilet paper to hand to me. It's like the grossest assembly line you have ever seen. Somehow we manage to complete the task and get the child cleaned up and re-pull-upped.***
***I am not sure if we'll be doing underwear again until these antibiotics are over. I can not risk that happening in the miniature Tinkerbell undies.
So now I am back on the couch. Watching Ellen now. Still browsing Facebook every few minutes - like something has changed in my social stratosphere.
Toby has taken Stella outside to play in her new baby turtle sandbox and the little Step2 Playhouse that Neh Neh and Bapaw bought her.
All is calm now in the Creekmore house.
Or is it?
Check back tomorrow around this time for the conclusion.... or actually, check back every day for the next 8 days until the prescription runs out.
Stella has also had a cold/allergies/virus thing going on for about a week or so and is on anti-biotics. I don't know about other children out there but antibiotics make my kid MEAN! There are other fun side effects of antibiotics so we've got her drinking yogurt drinks to avoid the female issues but there is yet another side effect that is unavoidable, unfortunately.
This afternoon has been rather enjoyable. Toby and I are sitting in the living room, enjoying the open windows and the nice weather. He's in his chair studying for his Electrician's Card and I am on the couch browsing Facebook and watching Oprah interview the people on the Yearning for Zion Ranch... totally enjoyable, right?! I hear Stella waking up from her nap so I go to her room and take the gate down (Yes I gate her in. Because if I don't she might sneak out and sit at my vanity and turn on my curling iron and burn her hand. Or whatever.)
So, I go to the kitchen to make my afternoon cup of coffee and I hear her say "I've got poop!" We're doing pull-ups for naps and nighttime so atleast it wasn't underwear.
Thank God it wasn't underwear.
She comes in the kitchen and I tell her to go tell Dada to change her pull-up. She says "No you do it." I say "No go tell Dada" and she says "No you do it" and I say "Go tell Dada!!" So she does.
And of course he doesn't move so finally I say "Come on Stella let's change you." I really wish I had started that spreadsheet I kept threatening... the one to keep track of poop changes and whose turn it is next.
Any new moms reading this? Take that as my first piece of advice.
So anyway, I put her on the changing table and pull down her pants and slowly tear the sides of the pull up and HOLY MARY MOTHER OF GOD it looked like someone dumped a pot of dark chocolate fondue in my child's diaper.
It was all up the front.
All up the back.
And all in there - if you pick up what I'm puttin down.
I say - calmly - "Toby, could you help please?" And he comes bounding around the corner. With a spring in his step like Johnny On the Spot. He rounds the corner and I swear I wish I had a nanny cam in Stella's room to catch this whole scene. We'd be millionaires.
He stops in his tracks and yells OH. MY. GOD. What is THAT?!?!?!? And before he even finishes that sentence, he is gone.
"I need help!!!" I've got both her legs up in one hand trying to keep her from moving a centimeter because the consequences of that, now that the pull-up is open, is unthinkable.
For the next few seconds, he is in panic mode. Just running in and out of the room. Like he doesn't know which way is up. He's yelling stuff. I do remember hearing "Do you want me to run the tub?!?" but that's it. There was a lot of other words. And gagging. And gasping for air. I heard "yard" and "hose" and several other words but it was all just a blur.
But through all this, I'm just standing there. Watching. He puts on a good show sometimes.
Finally he calms down enough to come in and hold her feet in the air while I try and wipe her...but at this point, there is no wiping...it's just shoveling sh*t from her onto the pull-up into a pile. I didn't care if I used a pack and a half of wipes on this one change. But only 4 wipes in, I am met with an empty box.
Toby and I look at each other and understood what needed to happen. No words were spoken.
I grabbed her feet and he went running to get more supplies. He comes back with a roll of toilet paper.
"Noooo!"
"Yes! Just use this so we don't waste wipes. All you're doing is shoveling right now. Then you can use the wipes to clean."
So he's rolling off toilet paper to hand to me. It's like the grossest assembly line you have ever seen. Somehow we manage to complete the task and get the child cleaned up and re-pull-upped.***
***I am not sure if we'll be doing underwear again until these antibiotics are over. I can not risk that happening in the miniature Tinkerbell undies.
So now I am back on the couch. Watching Ellen now. Still browsing Facebook every few minutes - like something has changed in my social stratosphere.
Toby has taken Stella outside to play in her new baby turtle sandbox and the little Step2 Playhouse that Neh Neh and Bapaw bought her.
All is calm now in the Creekmore house.
Or is it?
Check back tomorrow around this time for the conclusion.... or actually, check back every day for the next 8 days until the prescription runs out.
Sunday, March 22, 2009
Phyllis
I am just never in the mood to update the blog these days...But I am forcing myself because it's important and I love having this site as documentation of most of my life.
The biggest news is that my Great Aunt Phyllis will not be with us much longer. Probably not past tomorrow. She has had a long 4 months of mystery sicknesses and health scares. Crazy stuff like blood clots, bad reactions to prescribed mediations, circulation issues resulting in her feet turning black, surgeries, physical therapy, body aches and pains, etc. I can't even think of everything. In and out of different doctors offices and hospitals. There were a few mistakes and bad decisions made by doctors. Even through all of this, I don't think any of us REALLY thought she would be gone so soon. But in the end, it was FINALLY determined that she has Multiple Myeloma - thus the extreme bone pain. Her bones are erroding.
Phyllis is my Dad's aunt - my Nanny's sister. Phyllis is in black...
The biggest news is that my Great Aunt Phyllis will not be with us much longer. Probably not past tomorrow. She has had a long 4 months of mystery sicknesses and health scares. Crazy stuff like blood clots, bad reactions to prescribed mediations, circulation issues resulting in her feet turning black, surgeries, physical therapy, body aches and pains, etc. I can't even think of everything. In and out of different doctors offices and hospitals. There were a few mistakes and bad decisions made by doctors. Even through all of this, I don't think any of us REALLY thought she would be gone so soon. But in the end, it was FINALLY determined that she has Multiple Myeloma - thus the extreme bone pain. Her bones are erroding.
Phyllis is my Dad's aunt - my Nanny's sister. Phyllis is in black...
She's also the funniest person I have ever known.
And I am not the only person who would say that.
At my bridal shower, I came REAL close to peeing in my pants laughing at Phyllis - and so did several others. I have pictures.
She is always the life of the party - the center of attention. Especially at Christmas.
It's just not Christmas until Phyllis and Nanny sing their duet as Kenny and Dolly doing "I'll be home with bells on." I have video.
And now I have the song stuck in my head. DANG!! It's tradition to have that song stuck until atleast New Year's Eve.
Proof of the duet:
I wish you could hear it. You'd have it stuck in your head too.
Phyllis and Jimmy have been married for almost 50 years. They have an incredible farm out in Hanover County and just three years ago they opened a Farmer's Market. In the summer, we go atleast twice a week for vegetables (hanover tomatoes!) and flowers...but mostly to see Phyllis.
I can't imagine this summer.
My earliest memory of Phyllis was at Nagshead when ALL of my family used to go to the beach and rent a giant house. And I mean ALL of my family - both sides! (My mom and dad were neighbors as kids so both side of my family know each other.) I do not know how it started, but Phyllis taught me to say "OLAY!" at age two. I think it started with her Oil of Olay...not sure. But she loved to tell people about me running around saying "OLAY!"
I'll always have the memories of Phyllis and Jimmy's incredible parties EVERY Christmas Eve. I mean BIG parties. With giant shrimp and that pineapple centerpiece with pineapple, banana, and cherry skewers.
Phyllis worked at Lowenstein's forever - a really fancy jewelry store in the center of downtown Richmond. She helped Toby pick out my wedding ring.
My Nanny and Phyllis are super-close. I know Nanny will be ok - her faith is strong and deep. But her heart is broken and a BIG piece is missing now. I'm thinking a lot about Jimmy and their children Dennis and Tami. I'm really putting myself in Tami's shoes and then I have to jump out of them really really quick. My mind won't go there.
Life just scares me sometimes.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
My girl wants to POTTY all the time...
Stella is doing really well with potty training. I'm letting her lead the way totally. I got her a lot of toddler underwear and she wears them at home and is great about pee pee on the potty. (Poo poo? Not so much...but we're not worrying about that right now...) We do still wear a diaper (I want to use them up!) or a pull-up for naps, nighttime, and going out. It seems to be working just fine.
The only issue so far is that the big potty is just way too tall for her to get on it by herself; even with a step stool. I want her to be more independent and be able to go potty when she wants to... So I bought her a real little potty today.
It's THIS ONE. It is pink and princess-y and plays music when you pee. She HAD to hold the giant box all the way through Target. I could hardly see to push the cart but she would not let it go.
So we get home and I put it in the bathroom and she immediately sits on it to pee.
But she doesn't have to pee.
So she sits there. For a loooooooooong time.
And will not get up.
So I got her a cup of juice to drink on the potty in hopes it would go right through and she's get to hear some music. (Notice the crossed legs. She really was just chillin on the potty...)
There was still no pee so we're hanging out in the living room, waiting for pee.
It's fun.
In other Stella news - she cracks me up. Constantly.
She's really starting to become her own person and it's shocking to me. She's SO smart. And sometimes she's a smarty-pants.
Example: The new thing for her is when I tell her to stop doing something (going in the office, climbing on stuff, getting in my make-up, etc) she tells me "Oh, I'm ok." and continues to do whatever it was I said to stop. Drives me nutty!!
Example: Sometimes when I call to her to come to me in another room, she'll come in and say "WHAT NOW?!" Ummm, that ain't going to fly, sister.
Example: A lot of times when I talk to her, she looks me directly in the face and sticks her tongue out and blows a raspberry at me. Also not going to fly.
Example: She's now calling me "mom." As in "Thanks, Mom." or "No Thanks, Mom."
But I can't help go in the other room and chuckle. She's TWO. Going on 13.
"Happy Birthday" is still her term of affection. Whoever is with us...it's their birthday. We will be riding down the road with my Mom and it's "Happy Birthday, Neh Neh" about 10 times. Or eating dinner with my Mother in Law - "Happy Birthday, Mimi."
She remembers EVERYTHING.
The other day she busted out with "bad boy bad boys whatcha gonna do?" What the heck!? Toby watches Cops but not THAT much!
Family Guy on the other hand....)
Photo Sharing - Video Sharing - Photo Printing
So I'm thinking about finding a talent agency in Richmond for children.
I'm not joking. She's such a ham - she could be in commercials!
I PROMISE I will never be a Toddlers and Tiaras mom...
Let's see....Other Stella-isms:
- When I ask her to do something - anything! - she tells me "I need to do ____ first." That ___ could be anything and is usually different each time. Just now I asked her to do something and she grabbed my calculator and said "I need to check my e-mail first."
- When she wants you to keep doing something, she says "One more times, Mom."
- EVERY night she says "LAY DOWN WITH ME?" when we put her in the bed. Sometimes we do, but we don't want to make a habit of this so most of the time we say "No, your friends (stuffed animals) will lay with you." and she'll say "But Mom, lay with me one more times."
- Instead of "smell" she says "sum." So she'll hand me a candle or a flower and say "Sum it! Sums good...."
- She knows the words to all of the theme songs to all of her shows. It's incredible.
- When I tell her to put something down or not to touch something, she sets it down right where I told her NOT to and says "I'll just set it riiiiiiight here." Or she'll keep holding it and say "I'll just hold it really really tight." Like this is going to convince me to let her do it.
I'll have to come back and add more...there are a ton more little things that I don't want to forget. It's going by TOO fast.
The only issue so far is that the big potty is just way too tall for her to get on it by herself; even with a step stool. I want her to be more independent and be able to go potty when she wants to... So I bought her a real little potty today.
It's THIS ONE. It is pink and princess-y and plays music when you pee. She HAD to hold the giant box all the way through Target. I could hardly see to push the cart but she would not let it go.
So we get home and I put it in the bathroom and she immediately sits on it to pee.
But she doesn't have to pee.
So she sits there. For a loooooooooong time.
And will not get up.
So I got her a cup of juice to drink on the potty in hopes it would go right through and she's get to hear some music. (Notice the crossed legs. She really was just chillin on the potty...)
There was still no pee so we're hanging out in the living room, waiting for pee.
It's fun.
In other Stella news - she cracks me up. Constantly.
She's really starting to become her own person and it's shocking to me. She's SO smart. And sometimes she's a smarty-pants.
Example: The new thing for her is when I tell her to stop doing something (going in the office, climbing on stuff, getting in my make-up, etc) she tells me "Oh, I'm ok." and continues to do whatever it was I said to stop. Drives me nutty!!
Example: Sometimes when I call to her to come to me in another room, she'll come in and say "WHAT NOW?!" Ummm, that ain't going to fly, sister.
Example: A lot of times when I talk to her, she looks me directly in the face and sticks her tongue out and blows a raspberry at me. Also not going to fly.
Example: She's now calling me "mom." As in "Thanks, Mom." or "No Thanks, Mom."
But I can't help go in the other room and chuckle. She's TWO. Going on 13.
"Happy Birthday" is still her term of affection. Whoever is with us...it's their birthday. We will be riding down the road with my Mom and it's "Happy Birthday, Neh Neh" about 10 times. Or eating dinner with my Mother in Law - "Happy Birthday, Mimi."
She remembers EVERYTHING.
The other day she busted out with "bad boy bad boys whatcha gonna do?" What the heck!? Toby watches Cops but not THAT much!
Family Guy on the other hand....)
Photo Sharing - Video Sharing - Photo Printing
So I'm thinking about finding a talent agency in Richmond for children.
I'm not joking. She's such a ham - she could be in commercials!
I PROMISE I will never be a Toddlers and Tiaras mom...
Let's see....Other Stella-isms:
- When I ask her to do something - anything! - she tells me "I need to do ____ first." That ___ could be anything and is usually different each time. Just now I asked her to do something and she grabbed my calculator and said "I need to check my e-mail first."
- When she wants you to keep doing something, she says "One more times, Mom."
- EVERY night she says "LAY DOWN WITH ME?" when we put her in the bed. Sometimes we do, but we don't want to make a habit of this so most of the time we say "No, your friends (stuffed animals) will lay with you." and she'll say "But Mom, lay with me one more times."
- Instead of "smell" she says "sum." So she'll hand me a candle or a flower and say "Sum it! Sums good...."
- She knows the words to all of the theme songs to all of her shows. It's incredible.
- When I tell her to put something down or not to touch something, she sets it down right where I told her NOT to and says "I'll just set it riiiiiiight here." Or she'll keep holding it and say "I'll just hold it really really tight." Like this is going to convince me to let her do it.
I'll have to come back and add more...there are a ton more little things that I don't want to forget. It's going by TOO fast.
Monday, March 09, 2009
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