Saturday

Hellooooo!

Is everyone cold enough?

I am sitting on the couch in my flannel pants watching TRUE LIFE on MTV because I am 13 years old. Stella is pushing her "doo doo bear"** around in the laundry basket making choo choo sounds. (**It's actually a doodle bear that cousin Jenn gave her for Christmas - but she renamed him.)

Not an hour ago, Toby said the words "I am not doing a damn thing today!" and laid down on the couch under a blanket. Not 5 minutes later, his uncle called and said he needed him to come to his mamaw's house because there was no water and he needed his help to fix it. HA! Talk about jinxing yourself! Poor guy.

Things in the Creekmore household are going ok. Just plugging along...applying for jobs. :)

We are going on a double date night tonight with our friends Heath and Julie at Blackfinn. I got a $50 gift certificate there for $10 at http://www.restaurant.com. I HIGHLY recommend joining this site! I get special deals in my e-mail often. Today, I got one for 60% off the already drastically reduced certificates. And there are some great restaurants on there!!

Toby's Mom is keeping Stella AND Kendall overnight. Everyone say a prayer for her.

ANYWAY. I feel boring today.

In lieu of a ramble from me, here are pictures of Matt and Kristen's Engagement Party which was PERFECT.

It's all going to be fine in 2009.

I am so creative.

But I really do feel all cheeseball about this new year. I am EXCITED. This year is going to be the best in a long time. I can FEEL it.

There are a lot of major changes in the works for my little family. Changes, that a year ago, would have had me at the front desk of a mental facility - registering myself for an extended vacation. This year? I'm enjoying it. I'm looking forward to the changes. I'm not scared. And I know it's going to be OK - actually, better than ok. Bring it on!

This obviously tells me that the changes coming up have needed to happen for a long time... but we were not ready for them. We had to keep putting ourselves through hell because it just "wasn't the time." And I think we get comfortable in our own little personal struggles. Like Dr. Phil says "You're getting something out of it if you keep doing it." No matter how miserable you claim to be...when you are truly ready to change, you'll do it.

Let's get this party started.

Of course the three big topics of transition for us are the usual players:

1. Careers
2. Finances
3. Health/Weight Loss

I do not know when my last day at my current job will be. I know I HAVE to leave by the end of February when this program ends. I requested to leave earlier, but we shall see. I am steadily applying for jobs because I want to work during my severance period. Although, it would not hurt my feelings if my new job did not start for a couple weeks after leaving this one. It might take me a couple weeks to clean out and reorganize the shed! (I should add that as a #4 to the above list.)

I am not stressing out over job hunting. I have applied for a couple positions with the State...Lord knows they take forever to respond to you. I have applied at my dream company, SnagaJob.com. I have also applied (and have been recommended by a current employee and former colleague - so there is more promise with this one) at Wellpoint. I applied for most of these before the holidays, so I expect some responses (either interviews or rejections) in the next few weeks as the new year gets rolling.

I am, however, contemplating getting LASIK surgery between jobs. It probably wouldn't be a good idea to start a new job and then say "Hey, I need a few days off so I can get my eyeballs lasered." (They give you valium. That's the only reason I am even thinking about this.)

Toby is still unemployed, yet continues to find side jobs to fill his days. As crazy as this sounds, he seems happier to be "working" for himself. We have had conversations about him getting his General Contractor's Licence and starting his own business. That is a bit of money to shell out right now so we are just going to see how this side work continues...and if it keeps up, we'll probably go down that route. Shoot, he already has a van! All we'll need to do is spray paint a company name down the side! (Kidding about the spray paint.) But we do need a company name and we're taking suggestions!

I was thinking StelElectric. Like Stella + Electric. No? Ok....

Now on to NUMBER 2.

And that "number 2" description is pretty accurate as to my attitude towards weight and SHIT for awhile now. I work hard for a few days and then BAM - I just feel so OVER IT. I do the whole "why meeee?!?!" pity party and gorge myself on chocolate covered soybeans from Trader Joes.

I'm pretty fired up right now - atleast with the eating part. I just had a beautiful lunch with piles of vegetables. I want to focus on HEATLH more than anything - and I want weight loss to be an awesome benefit. I really don't think I will be successful if I just focus on losing weight to LOOK good...because you know what? In my old age, I could care less about that! Who am I impressing? (lol sorry Toby!)

I would love to be healthy and strong and lean... A machine! Oddly enough, my fitness idol is my favorite pop music star:

I mean, those ARMS! That would probably take more effort than doing some bicep curls with my 5 pounders through commercials during Biggest Loser on Tuesday nights.

See. My big motivation issue is with exercise. I don't particularly like it. I think it stems from my traumatic "RUN A MILE IN FRONT OF YOUR WHOLE CLASS" days in high school gym. Yes, I was always the last one.

I was what I would call a gym regular when I lived with Denny (Hello, Dahling!) in the fan. I was in my early 20s and had never set foot in a gym (other than the aforementioned traumatic PE classes.) We were both doing BODY FOR LIFE and it was like an alien took over my mind/body and I actually worked out EVERY DAY. I never did get that "I love to work out now and if I skip I don't feel complete" feeling that athletes boast about. But I did feel a commitment to go. At first I was a nighttime regular - sometimes at 10pm - which makes me laugh now because these days, I have been in bed for 1.5 hours by that time. Then, my friend Morgen and I started carpooling to the gym BEFORE work at 5:45 am and we did that for months. I felt fabulous.

Then a guy named Toby came along. And it was all she wrote.

I would really like to make the gym a regular part of my life. I do have a fitness center at work but I just can't make myself go there on a regular basis. First, I just can't go at lunch right now - I can barely eat lunch at lunch in my current situation. I can't come in early and go because I have Stella in the mornings until I take her to Mom's at 8am. And I would rather poke my eyes out then stay AFTER work to go down there. I want to get home to see my child after being away from her the entire day.

So, when I get home, my second (more important) job starts. Hang with Toby and Stella, fix and eat dinner, bathtime, play time, personal computer time, and then BED time.

I just need to win the lottery (that I don't play.) Then I'd have all the time in the world to go to the gym.

But there is the problem. I keep saying "go to the gym." You don't HAVE to go to the gym to exercise and that is where I am brainwashed. I feel like if you don't go to a fitness facility and pump iron and sweat your face off, then it's not even worth it to do anything. It's that "all or nothing" mentality that gets me every single time.

I need to come up with a realistic exercise plan for myself. At one point in my life, the all-encompasing BODY FOR LIFE was realistic. Now? Not so much.

I did have a brief love affair with JAZZERCISE earlier this year, but had to abandon it because of the expense. That was the most fun exercise I have ever done. I could totally pretend I was a dancer - and no one laughed at me. It was also nice to be in a big class with the music blasting - the 75 minutes went by so fast! And since it was a long class, I could go just twice a week and feel like that was fine. Although three times was ideal.

When I begin my severance and get a new job to bring in extra income, I think that Jazzercise will be a priority again. It's not like it's totally frivilous. It's for my health. And if it's the only thing that gets me off my butt these days, then it's money well-spent.

And speaking of money well-spent? I didn't do that in 2008.

Infact, I have never really done that, THUS the current financial situation we are in. Weeeeeeeeeeeeee!!

Seriously folks, we have got to budget and pay off debt PRONTO. Not only because of our job situations being a bit, shall I say, unpredictable - but I just want to be debt free and have a cushion to fall back on, if needed.

I am sick of worrying about money. SICK.OF.IT.

I want to sell Toby's Jeep. He doesn't need it - he has his van now. I want to pay off the loan we took out to put new windows on the house. I want to pay off the credit card which I SWORE would not get out of control again - and it did.

I don't need a mansion on the hill. I just want a clean slate. And some savings.

So, #3 is going to be hard but our current situation was a gift from God regarding a financial plan. I will be getting a job on top of my severance which will bring in extra money to pay those bills. I would love for nearly every cent (minus $45 a month for Jazzercise!) to go straight to paying off debt. I also plan to learn more about Dave Ramsey's Total Money Makeover and I might even sign up for some classes - I noticed that a church in my neighborhood is offering the course.

When these obligations are paid off, I will never return to this place financially.

And I mean it this time.

2008 was the last time for being utterly-miserable at a job, being this overweight and out of shape, and being this poor.

2009 is different. I know it!

Yo Gabba Gabba says "Don't Bite Your Friends!"

Stella might inspire a small tweak to that song...

When Stella got out of bed yesterday morning, the first thing she noticed was a microscopic ladybug in her carpet near her toys. "Mama! Ladybug!" I bent down to look and it was a DEAD ladybug...but I didn't say anything.

I went into the kitchen to fix her breakfast and here she comes with her ladybug. "Look Mama! My new friend!" and she took him into Dada who promptly said "It's dead!" and tried to take it away but she pitched a fit so he gave it back to her.

She ate breakfast and the ladybug had to sit on the end table and watch her eat. And then they played in her room for a bit.

Later, I was facebooking (yes, it's a verb) and she came running in...

"Mama! I ate my new friend!"

Huh? What did you say?

"Stella, where is your new friend?"

And she opened her mouth and pointed inside.

Nice!

Merry X-"mas"

I think Toby is sick, so that would totally keep up the tradition of sickness at holiday time!

He has been in bed all day in hopes that by 5pm, he would be ok to go to his Mom's house for our "Christmas" over there. We have a full day tomorrow, of course, but not nearly as full as years previous. My Dad's Mom (Nanny) has decided to move her Christmas Night tradition to the Sunday after Christmas and PRAISE THE LORD I am so happy about that!! I love that celebration and now I won't feel rushed or utterly exhausted for it.

Stella and I went to the MALL today!! Yes, I am a crazy nut. Actually, it was not crowded at all. I wanted to get us out of the house so Toby could rest and we wouldn't have to tip toe around all day. I thought it would be fun to bundle up and stroll Short Pump Mall with a Starbucks Caramel Apple Cider. It was actually very nice!

And on the way home, I saw a sign outside of a gas station at the corner of Broad and Parham that said:

Merry X-"mas"

Could someone enlighten me to placement of those quotes? lol

Yesterday was my last day of work until next Friday. I think next week will become Potty Training Bootcamp. I'm not going to force anything on her, but I think we'll do the "let her run around with nothing on all day" thing and see what happens. I'm really not looking forward to this milestone. For some reason, I feel like this one is going to be difficult. But that's how I felt about switching from formula to milk...and that was a breeze. Dear LORD let this one be too.

In other news!! Toby was officially laid off last week. He has been doing some side work to fill in some of the gap. When I have more time, I will write about the specific events of the past few weeks... It's alot - but it's also inspiring in an odd way. I guess in times of stress and struggle, you sometimes find peace. My job is also still hellacious but will end soon. I just don't know WHEN. Sooner than later, I hope. I have so many things I want to start doing...and I feel like I can't start them until I close THAT chapter in my book of life. Simple things like purge and clean the office and shed, organize all paperwork in the house, rearrange all shelving and cabinets to utilitize the storage options better, and even start taking better care of myself - physically, mentally, and spiritually. I have been so bogged down with this all-encompassing work thing that I have been unable to really focus on anything else - and my eating and activity is at the BOTTOM of the list. Actually, it's on like page 657.

I also have an AMAZING reason to get started on the weight loss again!! No, it does not directly involve me....but it's some wonderful news I got the other night. And I'll update you on that next time. I want to make sure I don't spill any beans before their time. :)

Merry Christmas, Everyone! Enjoy your family and friends. And the cookies.

Can't forget the cookies.

Christmas 2008 from Uncle Donnie

Another amazing gift from my friend, Donnie.

My Dearest Stella - Enclosed, a little holiday gift to let you know that I am thinking of you!! One of my favorite books to add to your library and to inspire your travels, and a second, very grown-up present, to help keep track of your library -
Happy holidays to you are your dear parents.
All my love,
Uncle Donnie


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Enclosed was a book called "Pamela's First Musical" and a set of personalized bookplates. Donnie is so damn fancy! Always has been. :)









And of course, Stella's favorite part was the ribbon that she made into a necklace and bracelet.





Thank you, Uncle Donnie. We love you very much and hope to see you soon!!!

Ya'll.

I don't even know where to start.

In the immortal words of Motion City Soundtrack:

"This shit storm's never ending and the atmospheric pressure's calling for rain..."

Let's do a numerical list, shall we?

1. Stella and I are watching Lazy Town which is the creepiest kids show ever, but she all of a sudden is obsessed with it. And the sunlight is coming into the front window DIRECTLY into my right eyeball. Of course.

2. I think I am almost done Christmas Shopping as I have just been buying things for a few months and throwing them into a big pile. Maybe it's time I take inventory?

3. I am just not in the holiday mood.

4. I really really really want to go into detail about my work life because I really have no hesitation at hurting someone's feelings as he has hurt mine about a gazillion times (a day!)...but I won't disclose any info to the internet world and I will be the bigger person. But it's hard.

5. The GOOD news about my work life is that I will not have to endure it for much longer. As with every other company on the planet, mine is experiencing downsizing. Before the involuntary cuts, they offered an "opt out" program for those who just wanted to just go. And I took it! It's a nice severance package that will cover me for quite a few months and I'll have time to find a new job that doesn't make me cry every.single.day.

6. Toby's job is non-existent. Almost. He worked one day this week so that's going to be a really nice paycheck next friday. That might pay his nextel bill. His company called him yesterday and said "You can be laid off if you want." He decided NOT to take them up on that offer. So he is still employed and we applied for partial unemployment benefits...and he is filling in the holes with side-work. If the work picks up, he'll be the first one that his company calls, and he'll get his 2 weeks vacation that he deserves next year. He has been hitting the pavement looking for a new full-time job and NO ONE is hiring. I bet he went to 30 electrical companies last week when he was off. Most were closing their doors and going bankrupt.

7. This economy is scaring the hell out of me.

8. But I have never been so sure of something in my life that we are going to be ok. I KNOW it. It's almost scary how CALM I am with all of this. If we have to declare bankruptcy, then we do. We aren't alone. It's through no fault of our own that we can 't pay bills. It's not like we ran around buying cars and jewelry and went into huge debt. We are in huge debt...but it's certainly not because we went on shopping sprees. That would have been a hell of a lot more fun.

9. And because we are so rich at the moment, the freezer decided to stop working and all of my frozen foods are mush. I quickly cooked all of the 1/2 frozen chicken and the steam and mash potatoes (for dinner tonight) the rest went into the garbage because they were really mushy.

10. Don't EVER buy a frigidaire appliance. EVER. Our last fridge at the old house was that brand as well and it did the same thing several times. We had to keep getting it fixed. The first time it did this was on our wedding day when Toby got up and walked into the kitchen and splashed into 2 inches of water.

**** The time between #10 and #11 has been about 6 hours. The reason for the lapse is that my Dad came over to look at the freezer and realized the WHOLE fridge is dead so we had to bring the dorm fridge in from the garage and fill it with what could fit (which is basically a hot dog) and then take the rest of the stuff next door to Mom and Dad's fridge in the apartment.... and then I just left the house and went to BJ's with Mom to get out of here. Hey, I THINK I finished my christmas shopping.

11. Toby and I are going to Home Depot in a minute to get a new.... go ahead! Guess!

12. The Jerk is on TV right now and is at my favorite part where Steve Martin and Bernadette Peters sing that duet (complete with harmony) at the campfire and she breaks out the trumpet...

13. It was a good thing (?) that Toby did not have to work this week because Mom had the stomach flu until Thursday! I worked from home on Monday (making my boss really really happy - NOT) and then Toby had her until Friday when he started a side job.

14. This side job is for my Mom's friend's son who flips houses... And just in the past 2 days, Toby has gotten several more jobs from him AND met and befriended his General Contractor who has another LOAD of jobs for Toby...and they both told him they he needs to go get his contractor's license and a business license and they would employ him only on their jobs.... lots more to this but I won't bore you...BUT, isn't it AMAZING how everything happens for a reason? I just KNOW this is all going to work out for the best. (See #8.)

15. I figured out a way to make my own Chai Tea Apple Cider so I don't have to spend $10 for a grande at Starbucks. Now I just need the caramel syrup and sauce.

16. Stella got her hair cut today at a really cute place called Pigtails and Crew Cuts and she sat in a police car while they cut her hair. Hope that's the ONLY time she sits in a police car.

17. "I'm picking out a thermos for you!" (The Jerk is still on....)

18. Tomorrow is a FULL day with the Santa Tea at noon. This Santa Tea is a replica of the old "Miller and Rhodes Christmas." M&R was a huge department store in downtown Richmond that has long since closed it's doors. This is where my parents used to take me and Matt to see the REAL Santa when we were little. A small boutique shop around the corner from our house, called Feathernesters, has revived the old M&R Christmas with this Santa Tea and the REAL Santa is there. He is about 165 years old now...but he's the same one that I used to see. And the original Snow Queen...and they have Rudolph Cake...and Santa does the same speech and drinks his milk the same... It's one of those "Richmond" things..... Anyway, we're looking very forward to this. (Oh, click the link to Feathernester's and tell me if you think my family deserves royalities? LOL We (mostly Stella) are on the opening page and the scrapbook page!)

19. Tomorrow night we are having dinner with Toby's mom, her boyfriend, Toby's sister Kim, her daughter Kendall. After dinner we are going to the Lewis Ginter Festival of Lights. I think Stella and Toby (the electrician) will get a kick out of all the lights.

20. I think 20 is a good number to stop on although I could bend you ear about all kinds of stuff for 20 more... I'll update again soon. Sooner than I did last time.

Tagged

Melanie tagged me.

I have been tagged to post the 4th picture in the 4th folder in My Pictures...

I haven't even looked at it yet.... let's see...


HOW APPROPRIATE! It's the "Welcome to Banner Elk" sign from my Buzzfest 2008 file.

I am (not so) fondly remembering the smell in my car as I snapped this shot. It was about 15 minutes after Stella spewed all over herself and in each and every crevice of her car seat.

What an awesome weekend. :)

P.S. I tag LESLIE!!

Practice Makes Perfect

My parents have me reciting "The Night Before Christmas" on cassette tape when I was around Stella's age. My mom has been working with the grandchild, to carry on the tradition. She obviously wasn't into this practice session...but we tried!

Oh, excuse Toby's stocking cap. She would not take it off. The girl loves her head gear.


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Stella and her Toothbrush

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P.S. She insisted upon wearing her ear protections headphones.

I did let her know I was the parent here and did not let her wear them to bed. Gotta put your foot down somewhere.

Ok. You got me.

So she wore them to bed. But I snuck in and took them off when she was asleep.

2 Real Conversations

Conversation 1

Toby: Who do you love?

Stella: Mama

Toby: (acts sad) Do you love me?

Stella: Now! (when she's being cute, her "no" sounds a lot like a drawn-out "nooooww!")

Toby (trying again): Who do you love?

Stella: Mama (short pause to think).... and the Simpsons.

Conversation 2

Toby calls me at work around 4:30 yesterday.

Toby: Hey! I'm just leaving the shop now. I hit a deer on the way back to the shop today!

Me: What? Are you ok?

Toby: Oh yeah, I'm fine. The deer is dead.

Me: Awww

Toby: Yeah, one swift blow to the head with a sledge hammer.

Me: WHAT?!?!?!

Toby: Well Stephanie, it would have been cruel to leave it on the side of the road with 2 back legs broken!

Me: Ugh. (Putting right hand over face and lowering head down to desk.)

Toby: Yeah. So we took it back to the shop and gutted and cleaned it......

Me interrupting: OH MY GOD. What?!?!

Toby: That's some good meat! I wasn't just going to leave it there! Dusty took the ribs and Drew took the hind-quarter and I got 2 tenderloins and the left shoulder...the right shoulder was where I hit it with the sledge hammer, that meat was too bruised to take.

Me: Ummm. GROSS.

Toby: You don't know what you're missing.

Phone conversation ends and I hang up. I yell to my cube mate "KRISTIE!!!!"

She comes running "What?!?"

Me: I married a redneck.