Conversation 1
Toby: Who do you love?
Stella: Mama
Toby: (acts sad) Do you love me?
Stella: Now! (when she's being cute, her "no" sounds a lot like a drawn-out "nooooww!")
Toby (trying again): Who do you love?
Stella: Mama (short pause to think).... and the Simpsons.
Conversation 2
Toby calls me at work around 4:30 yesterday.
Toby: Hey! I'm just leaving the shop now. I hit a deer on the way back to the shop today!
Me: What? Are you ok?
Toby: Oh yeah, I'm fine. The deer is dead.
Me: Awww
Toby: Yeah, one swift blow to the head with a sledge hammer.
Me: WHAT?!?!?!
Toby: Well Stephanie, it would have been cruel to leave it on the side of the road with 2 back legs broken!
Me: Ugh. (Putting right hand over face and lowering head down to desk.)
Toby: Yeah. So we took it back to the shop and gutted and cleaned it......
Me interrupting: OH MY GOD. What?!?!
Toby: That's some good meat! I wasn't just going to leave it there! Dusty took the ribs and Drew took the hind-quarter and I got 2 tenderloins and the left shoulder...the right shoulder was where I hit it with the sledge hammer, that meat was too bruised to take.
Me: Ummm. GROSS.
Toby: You don't know what you're missing.
Phone conversation ends and I hang up. I yell to my cube mate "KRISTIE!!!!"
She comes running "What?!?"
Me: I married a redneck.
5 comments:
haha i know my hubby wouldn't do that - but he WOULD call his brother to come kill it for him! hahah
LOL! I love it!
And I was wondernig if I should feel bad that the Simpsons were on our tv tonight.
I could be in a terrible mood and read one of your blogs and everything about me changes. Take that as a compliment...you always make me laugh!!!
OMG ROLLING MY BUTT OFF LAUGHING AT THIS...I needed to read your blog tonight! LOVE IT!
Hahahaha. I read this to my husband and his response was "well, what else are you going to do with perfectly good deer meat?"
Post a Comment